Definitely, Maybe

‎”I can’t believe you drank and smoked and was such a slut. But I still love you.”

It’s August 16th. Happy Ex-mas!

I just finished watching “Definitely, Maybe” (thus the title), and I decided to actually blog. First, because that’s how I live with August 16 (the ex-anniversary), blogging about happy and sober thoughts. Second, while watching the movie, I fell in love with a particular line already stated above. And lastly, the title just fits me: my feelings, my life.

I should not be doing this, as I just realized earlier. I should not be celebrating ex-anniversaries, but I do. I always do. Later, I’m going to treat myself with things, or food rather, that I definitely like. I will not keep myself from buying stuff I want. Just for a day, a few hours of momentary mayhem.

But in the end, I blogged. Because there is something to celebrate: a very beautiful relationship, that although ended up not-so-good, still worth remembering.

I admire you, J. For keeping this spirit in me alive, because every time we talk as friends, there seems no hatred between us instead a glowing gratefulness for what we experienced years back that made us more cautious and more mature individuals. I thank you for the positive attitude I now have in life, that I never falter to thank God for His indescribable gifts – you being one of those gifts, and you being that one of a few persons who taught me how much my God, your God, and our God loves us no matter how bad or stupid or a mess we are. Happy Ex-mas, J! I know, we feel awkward when we were together, but in that awkwardness lies the happiness that we are still able to keep up with this kind of friendship, against all odds! You, really, are one of the best people I ever met in this entire lifetime. And yes, “I can’t believe you drank, and smoked, and was such a slut… I still love you.” Well, I’m definitely, maybe in love with you… in a harmless and pure way, I swear! Haha.

Cheers! To all the laughs, tears, and promises we shared. To all the gifts that remind us of all the beautiful and heavenly feeling for years. To all the joys, pains, and learnings that our break up caused us. For the second chance we grabbed, and the third chance we ignored, and the many other chances that this wonderful life gives us just to be together, no matter how different we became through the years. For all those school works we’ve done together, be it journalism or architecture. For all the reasons we made up just to be together. For all the denials that came from our mouths whenever we are teased and taunted by friends. For all those time that we tried to act normal, despite the fact that we’re dying to blush, and smile, and hug. For all those secret stares, and stolen glances we always share. For all the love, the care, the acceptance, and the unending thankfulness we feel for having each other as our first beloved. Cheers, J! Cheers to all who became part, and who continues to become part of our epic endeavor to find success, love, and happiness in the things that we do.

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Happy Ex-mas indeed.

P.S. Got the term Ex-mas in a book I read last weekend. It’s cute! 🙂


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